Finding Blessings From Unexpected Places

I had the best talk with a mom at the bus stop the other day. In our talk I asked if her husband was one of the other Marines that was in the area. She said yes, and went on to explain how he was and what he did in this area, since it is not really a military town. In the process she asked about my husband since he is not in the unit or one attached to her husbands; although they run into each other from time to time. I told her my husband is a recruiter in the area. The topic ran from there. She told me about her experiences while her husband was recruiting, and how she made it through and gave me some helpful advice. I noticed that like many others in our situation, there were some good things that were said, but it was mostly negative. I shared some of my experiences so far with her, only to find that they were running in vastly different paths. Where this woman had a horrible experience, one that she was reluctant to talk about, I found that I was not. This made me very hesitant to share my mostly going positive experience. Although it did not start out positive, mainly because of my attitude, the more I think better on it the more positive my experience is. I realized that I have been extremely blessed. We are in a place where I can call on my family anytime, they are 30 minutes or less away and we are so lucky for that. We are also extremely blessed that he gets to be home. He may work ridiculous hours, and on weekends, it may suck all around but he is home. He is not in danger, he may miss a bedtime or an event but it is not constant like a deployment. He is present when he can be and I understand when he cannot. That is hard to say. I was mad, so mad that he was state side and not there. I felt like he should be there since he was not gone. Now I can be at peace with it and accept that he dies what he can and that the kids and I are not the only ones making sacrifices. This is the best thing for him and for our family and we are extremely blessed that we landed where we did. I can also be at peace with the fact that although this duty is harder and unlike anything we have ever experienced, it can be good with a good attitude. Never before have I  felt blessed like this or expected to find this in unexpected places. It was incredible to find that. I was humbled by the experience and thankful of the reminder.

We are all in the same boat

As our duty progresses I have found that there are many things that I look forward to and others that I can not stand.

I love that I have my family nearby as a support system. I have no idea what I would do without them. They have been there for me when I needed them. They have helped me with the children, when I needed help around the house or when I just needed to vent to them about this duty. I have become closer with my family as I have gotten older but this duty has made it so much more of a blessing. I am glad that I have them because I have not had this hard of a time in a duty station before.

Here I have found that there is a sever lack of comradery. I have never truly experienced the division among the branches of service until we moved onto an Army base. Now understand that this is a small base and it is full of other branches, many navy green and blue side, as well as Air force and some other Marines as well. My spouse being in the service as long as he has brought to light the way that the different branches 'rag' on each other, if you will. I have never actually been ostracized or treated any differently because of what branch my husband felt suited him best.

I first experienced this when I got over my social awkwardness and anxiety and went up an introduced myself so some neighbors. I spotted a few women chatting by our house one day and said hello and introduced myself. We got to talking about the normal things, where we had previously lived, how we liked it here, and everything was going well.; I thought I was making a few new friends. Then they asked where in North Carolina we had lived and immediately I said Camp Lejeune. This was met with blank stares, I clarified that my husband is a Marine. The reaction  to this was like a slap in the face. Immediately these two women turned up their noses and said, "Oh your a MARINE WIFE" as if that was some classification of who I was. Then they suddenly had errands to run and have not talked to me in since.

I would like to say something to those women and all women who act this way. You are no different than me, if you are an officers spouse, a new spouse, or a spouse in any branch of service. Go ahead and pull out your ID card, I bet it looks just like mine, I bet you get the same benefits as me, and I bet your spouse deploys just like mine. Your spouse fights for all of our freedom just like mine does. You sacrifice just like I do. You miss your spouse when they are away just like I miss mine. You cry, send packages, love letters, and are full of pride in your spouse.

We are all in the same boat here fighting the same fight. Not one of us is better than another, no matter the branch of service or the rank that is held. Making it so that others do not feel welcome is not only impolite, it is hurtful and it gives you a bad name. It is mainly extremely unnecessary. We should be supporting each other, building each other up; this life is not easy, it is hard and lonely. Making friends and sharing the military spouse bond is the best way to survive the work of times. Especially with recruiting duty, just being near a base is a blessing in this case, it is truly amazing, and it is one of the worst. Having someone there to be supportive that I can relate to, because no matter how much we love our family sometimes they just don't understand. We need that military spouse to vent to and help us through. I know that I could have definitely used a friend recently, someone who would not bring me down or push me away because of the branch of service that I am associated with.

Summer Homeschooling week one

So since summer has been in full swing we decided to jump on the homeschool train. We had been thinking of doing this for sometime, however we never made the full commitment to homeschooling. To be honest it is a bit overwhelming and I am never sure if my kids are learning enough. So we decided to try it for the summer so the kids won't fall behind or forget anything.

 Since they are so young things are pretty low matinance and flexible. We have a schedule that we stick to, sort of, and I actually made a bit of a criculum to follow. I chose to use some workbooks that I felt were on the level my children were on. They chose what science and social studies topics we will study. The way we do this is they learn about the topic five days a week, with a craft and experiments. We review on Saturday and on Sunday they make a poster or project to teach their Father and I about what they learned that week. 

My kindergardner (1st grade this upcoming fall) does a page a day out of one book and two chapters of math books every day. She also reads alone for 15-30 minutes each day, as well as reading with me or her dad. She does several lists of sight words as well throughout the day. She will answer comprehension questions after each reading. For writing she writes, using sight words, her own story with a pictures. If I can not read it or have to ask what a word is she has to do it again, legible writing is a huge thing for us. 

My preschooler also does a page a day book. His page a day is for the letters of the alphabet. He will trace the letter several times then write it on his own. He also does a color, shape, and  number a day with several coloring pages and activities. He will find the number of the day (2) green objects, then find two green circles. Then find two things that start with 'D' and maybe a green 'D'. I will also have him play with blocks or Legos for quiet time if he isn't feeling a nap or he colors and has books. Each child had a quiet/nap time bin with quiet activities. 

Yes we do screen time. In the morning I let them have a half hour of cartoons, usually an educational show or a learning movie, like hooked on phonics. They also get an half hour at the end of the day to watch whatever show they want. They get one hour of time on a learning app or website 15-30 minutes on each subject. 

We do lessons that I can take on the go. So I can do their worksheets in the morning or evening, depending on what we are doing during the day. I can do any of their lessons or reading at the pool or beach during their snack or 'adult swim' time. I made them so they can have breaks between an still gather the concept.

They do indoor and outdoor obstacle courses they make themselves working together. We also make bubbles, sight word (letter and number) hopscotch. Water balloon color tag. (This is messy but fun for tiedye if our game.) we also have one art project a week, they love that.

Our rainy day is lots of crafts, coloring, fort building, baking/cooking, and reading. I use whatever I can to incorporate the lessons of the day. I keep facts going all day so it's always in their minds.

Like I said before it is a pretty flexible schedule. I purpously made it so that we could run errands, go to a movie, the gym or the pool, everyday; all the while still haveing our outings and play dates and not feel rushed. It was important for me that the kids and I enjoy our summer while still getting in necessary learning. I did not want to freak out because so didn't stick to the schedule completely and feel like I had failed. 

So far things have been working great! Hopefully this will keep up for the rest of the summer. 👍🏻😄

Science:

Water cycle 

Life cycle

Volcanos

Recycling

Plants

Rainbows

Space/planets 

Social studies:

Five oceans

Seven continents

Land forms

Reading a map

City, State, Capital

Sensory

Zoo/ocean animals

Human body

Art projects:

Making sun catchers 

Rock painting

Self portrait

Nature art

Sidewalk chalk

All about me collage

Sculpting with play dough/ clay

Making beaded Jewelry 

Websites:

Kids YouTube

ABCya.com

Abcmouse.com

PBSkids.org

Hookedonphonics.com

Kids YouTube channels:

TED-Ed

PBS nova

Minute Physics

Full time kid

I may never understand or know him

Is yin in bed the other night I could help but stare at my husband and think what Lucky girl I am. He may be one a lot and this duty may be hard but he try's so hard and he is just simply the best. He does everything under the sun and more. Then I was thinking about how well I know him. As we both have changed through the years, and that is expected With multiple deployments and age. 

I wondered do I still know my husband? We used to know each other so well; have this understanding of each other. As I was thinking I realized, I will never u derstand him no matter how hard I try. I can understand what he dealt with or saw on deployments. How could I? I can support him, try to be his balm, but will that be enough? I understand and relate that he needs to be with people who have shared experiences. But that person will never be me. Can I live win that? Can I live with knowing that i may never be enough? 

Stealing time

So recently with this I have felt like my husband works ALL the time, and well the truth is, he does.  Anytime I can, I go and steal time with him. I know how that sounds but it is exactly what feel I am doing. I am snatching him away from this job that I constantly have to battle with. I am workin on being okay with that.

His job is very time consuming. It's more so than any other we have experienced. It's longer than the field ops, it's longer than training, and it seems just as tiring. The light side is that it is not a field op, or teaining, or thank goodness a deployment. It's just recruiting. 

Yet, I have a hard time assimilating with anything about this duty and post. If you haven't experienced it you can't understand. It is an entireally different beast of its own with all new feelings. Like a deployment or homecoming no one can understand how you feel unless they have shared in the moment. With all other recruiting spouses I know they understand how this is so different.

No amount of preparation could have helped. Never before did stealing time with him make it to this level. I am just going to have to be a good time thief and not feel guilty about having time with my husband. He is mine too! 

New duty

It has been a LONG time. Things have been super crazy, and  LOTS have changed. So back to the grind. Last we left with homecoming and package extensions and the works. Y'all will be happy to hear that a package extension was approved! And my hubs was shipped off to California for recruiting school and a new duty station was accepted. 😀

I did not have a good experience with recruiting school. I was putting the house up for rent and packing it in my own with two kids. It was a nightmare, as if hubs didn't have enough on his plate with school I was freaking out at home. I felt so overwhelmed with finding a Renter or deciding to sell, getting all the necessary paperwork for us with schools and doctors. Then having to pack the necessary items and getting aTMO/DMO in order. 😕

I was also freaking out about recruiting duty! I had herd such terrible things about it. The long hours, the constant stress, living as roommates. I was horrified. Yet there is always a silver lining and I like to thank those women Jo said good things. That had been my lifesaver!!!! The ones who said It is what you make; it depends on the command, and the just be there for each other. It has been nothing like a deployment or being a single parent; if you haven't experienced it there is no way to explain it. Those great women have made this experience better.

 To anyone out there that is going on recruiting duty or contemplating it, it is not horrid. Like any duty it has its ups and downs but finding what works best for you is the key. -but I'm sure y'all know that😉- 

Finding a routine has been our biggest challenge. Hopefully we will all get out of our funk we have been in and get back on track.  We had the blessing of being stationed in our hometown. So our family is close, going is a great support system. It has it's moments but we are getting there. New duty, new home, new friends, new everything. It has taken us longer to adjust than we would have liked; so much has changed in our hometown since we have been away. 

It is a great big new adventure! 😁 stay tuned 

Call to brighten up the place!

This week has been crazy! With a Happy Mothers Day to all the moms out there. If there is anyone out there. Anyone?

I have dome some serious retail therapy!! New clothes and a new laptop. It has helped with my funk mood. But hopefully I can jut chill for a while. The hubs does want to take a nice trip when he gets back. I am thinking Disney World for Christmas!! We shall see. 

We got to talk to the hubs this week. It was great to hear from him, an in Mother's Day too. He never let's me down. The call came at 0100 so the kids were asleep. it was so good to hear his voice. I feel like an idiot but I always grin like a fool after I hear from him. I am guessing I was down because of the kilo day and that's the reason for the shopping. After the call no cards need be swiped!

It is amazon what just talking to him does, even with the kids. he called twice to leave a special message for the kids. They want to listen to it all the time. An they take their daddy dolls everywhere. Just listening to the message has gotten Little Lady out of her terrible moods and has put Wee Man in a food place. They have slept all night ALL week!!!!! 

That's a huge deal! We all are rested and sit just is great. The hubs has gotten our packages and letters within two weeks. Wherever he is he can stay because the mail is wicked fast!! He is in a great mood from not having to wait on them. I will admit that I hype them up so he looks forward to it. But at least he's happy! 

Little lady has been asking for soccer camp and ballet classes. So we have been looking into that. I am complicating July in Maryland with our family and Florida in August to visit a great friend. 

Oh yeah an the Back Street Boys are going back on tour! So for giggles and a blast from the past some girls and I are looking into getting tickets!! 

Until next week! Staying strong!